*BONK*

It is amazing to me how quickly children pick up on what buttons to push to make you tick, to make you move faster than the speed of light, and to make you sympathize. I fully believe that she knows exactly what she's doing when she consistently and DAILY gets into the things I don't want her to. We have a routine down that MUST be adhered to or I shall lose my mind. Maybe these are good tips, words of wisdom, if you will. Or maybe it's just my kid.

First things first, I MUST...

-not give her a bottle too close to bedtime or she will wake up in the morning in a puddle of pee. 

-I must secure the diaper straps securely around her belly at night or she will wake up in the morning in a puddle of pee

-I must keep her sheets rotating every other day so that she doesn't continue to wake up in the same puddle of pee (Is it crazy to think that she might be deliberately doing handstands in her bed when she pees so it all trickles up her front!??)

-Her morning bottle must be heated in the microwave for exactly 20sec or she wont drink it- she'll turn it upside down and watch it slowly leak out... one. drip. at. a. time.

Once breakfast is over and before I set her loose, I MUST...

-Close the laundry room door to prevent her from eating cat food and dumping the water out all over the floor for her to paint with. 

-Close the bathroom door so she doesn't mummify herself in TP and dunk it all in the toilet. 

-Put up the baby gate to going up stairs to help keep her chaos somewhat contained to one level and keep everyone from being angry with her for going through their stuff.

-Close the basement door so that I can keep track of her easier on one level. 

This is just SOME of my day. It's funny to think about, yes. But sometimes it can be so tiring. But then I have days where all I can do is laugh and yesterday we had one of those moments. I was trying to put away some clothes in my closet and she was trying to shove me in and close the door!! Well in the process she lost her balance and bonked her head on the door. I waited to see if it was a hurt-cry or a fake-cry. Sounded real to me! So I got down on the floor with her and cradled her in my arms and rocked with her till the crying subsided. I tried to pull her away a few times to check her head, but she would instantly snuggle back into my arms! It was so adorable I couldn't help but give in to her. So finally, after about 5-8min of this I set her back up on her feet and watched her walk away... right up to the closet door and deliberately bonked her head again! She turns around and comes running back to my lap with the fake-cry! I was busting up laughing! The little stinker! See what I mean about the buttons? She knows them. She pushes them. She watches for my reaction.